


Strangers With Benefits

by alkjira



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal Sex, Hook-Up, House Party, M/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-15
Updated: 2014-09-15
Packaged: 2018-02-17 13:13:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2310887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alkjira/pseuds/alkjira
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nori throws a party and Dwalin is nice enough to bring a tall, handsome, dark-haired gift for the host.<br/>At least, that's Nori's version of it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Strangers With Benefits

**Author's Note:**

  * For [diemarysues](https://archiveofourown.org/users/diemarysues/gifts).



> I hate titles so much.  
> Almost as much as I loooove diemarysues. Hope you like this, honey!

"Dwalin!" Nori called as he saw his friend and co-worker make his way through the crowded flat. "Glad you could make it!"

 

Dwalin raised his hand to show that he’d seen Nori, or heard him. Perhaps both, but who knew. He could just feel like waving.

  
  
The living room, and the rest of the flat too for that matter, was filled with people talking and laughing, and somewhere in the background was the fairly loud sound of some music Nori didn’t quite recognize. Lots of drums and what sounded like a trumpet. Ah, the wonders of the Internet. Gone were the days when a throwing a party meant finding bits and pieces (sometimes literally) of your and your friends’ CD collections all over the place.

  
  
The merrymaking had been going for quite a while, and Nori had quite a pleasant buzz tingling beneath his skin, but as he was the host he was going to make sure it stayed with just a buzz. Dori had raised him right. It wasn’t Dori’s fault that Nori had then chosen to ignore his teachings in more than a few aspects over the years. Still, getting drunk at your own parties was just poor behaviour, even if it also was convenient considering the easy access to a familiar bed and bathroom.

 

"I brought a couple of people," Dwalin said as he stopped in front of where Nori was sitting on the back of the couch. The big man looked over Nori’s shoulder, into the kitchen. "Which might have been a mistake. Did you invite the whole bloody town?"

 

"Eh, there's still room," Nori said and waved his hand dismissively. “No one is even sitting on the table yet so it's fine. Or they didn’t the last time I was in the kitchen. And by 'people' do you mean I'll finally get to meet your mysterious boyfriend?"

 

Nori tried to look around Dwalin, which was somewhat of a challenge as the man was broader than a barn door. "Oh, is he the tall hot one?"

 

"No," the tall hot one said drily. "I'm his cousin." He looked around as well. "I'm not sure where Bilbo disappeared to."

 

"You lost him?" Dwalin asked, and the amount of frankly  _unnecessary_ alarm in his voice (sure some of the other guests might look a little wild, but none of them bit, though they might nibble if you asked nicely) made it clear that Bilbo was indeed the mysterious boyfriend. Amazing progress!  
  
  
Dwalin was one of the most closed-mouth people Nori had ever gotten to know, but now there was a name! And unless one of Nori’s closets had acquired a Narnia, there was no way someone could just disappear inside his flat, which meant that there would soon be a face as well. Perhaps more if this mystery person wasn't fond of clothes.  


"I was not aware he was _mine_ to lose," Tall'n'Hot replied. "He was following as we left the hallway, just as I was following you."

 

"You lost Bilbo," Dwalin said and crossed his arms.

 

"I'm sure he'll turn up," Nori said and reached out to pat Dwalin's arm. "We can start by checking here beneath the couch cushions, that's usually where I find small things. And I assume he's small if he was so easily lost."

 

"I'm right here," an amused voice said. "And I'm not small."

 

"You aren't very big either, sweetheart," Nori pointed out as he swept his gaze over the small man who had appeared next to Dwalin. The top of the curls that couldn't quite decide if they wanted to be blond or brown reached no higher than Dwalin's shoulders, and he was even more narrow over the shoulders than Nori was. Button nose and hazel eyes, and a bottom lip that would be excellent for pouting. He was adorable. And tiny. "No wonder they lost you."  
  
  
Perhaps Dwalin should just carry him around in a pocket.

 

" _I_ didn't lose anyone," Tall'n'Hot sighed.

 

"I'm not small," Bilbo looked up at Dwalin. "Am I small?"

 

"Quick," Nori hissed and winked at Dwalin. "Tell him he's the biggest you've ever had."

 

A snort came from Tall'n'Hot and Nori aimed a smirk his way. A very appreciative one, because yeah, Tall’n’Hot very much lived up to both aspects of his name and Nori would very much like to nibble on his jaw. If he was asked to, of course. "I’m sorry, I'm being very rude-"

 

"I'm so surprised," Dwalin muttered.

 

"Hi, I'm Nori," Nori said and jumped down from the couch to hold out a hand to the tall, dark, very sexy, hopefully single, stranger. “Working with your cousin, if he’s not already told you where he was dragging you this fine night.”

 

"Thorin," Tall'n'Hot replied. "Thank you for inviting us."

 

"So are big hands a family trait?" Nori asked as his hand was all but dwarfed during the handshake. No obvious callouses, but not the soft hand of someone pushing paper around for a living either. "No wait, I've seen Dwalin naked, is-"

 

"And that's enough," Dwalin said as one of said very big hands came down to cover Nori's mouth.

 

When Nori immediately flicked out his tongue to lick it Dwalin snatched it back and wiped the hand on his trousers with a look of faint disgust.

 

"And hello to you, mysterious boyfriend Bilbo," Nori said and released Thorin's hand with a final brush of his thumb. He ducked around Dwalin and slung his arm around the smaller man’s shoulder, giving him a little squeeze. Tiny! "I swear there was no touching when I saw Dwalin naked. I accidentally walked in when he was changing, that’s all."

 

" _Accidentally_ ," Dwalin muttered.

 

"See," Nori nodded. "A complete and utter accident.” He patted Bilbo’s shoulder before taking a step back and bouncing, in a very dignified manner of course, on his heels. “Can I get you something to drink? All of you?" He made sure to make eye contact with Thorin in particular. "Or if there’s anything else I can get you..?"

  
  
Unless Nori was mistaken the look he received in return was _not_ one devoid of interest. Most excellent. Even if this Thorin didn’t turn out to share certain aspects of Dwalin’s physique he was certainly fit and pretty enough that he’d have to be really dull in bed for Nori not to enjoy himself. Just the beard would be a nice-

 

"NORI!” Bofur shouted from the general direction of kitchen. "Could you make pancakes for us? And by us I mean me!"

 

"Make them yourself!" Nori called back.

  
  
“Come here!”

  
  
“You come here!” Then he remembered that any requested drinks would be in the kitchen. “FINE, I’M COMING! So, beer for you I’m guessing,” he said to Dwalin. “And for you?” he asked Bilbo.

  
  
“Whatever you’re getting Dwalin make that two,” the blond said and smiled at him. “Thank you.”

  
  
“And you, Thorin?” Nori smiled at him and silently asked him to please say beer so he could watch that pretty mouth around the neck of a bottle.

 

“Nori!” Bofur called again. “Um, watch where you’re stepping!”

  
  
“For fuck’s sake,” Nori muttered. “Don’t touch anything! I’m coming!” He smiled apologetically at Thorin before climbing back on and over the couch, beginning to weave through the crowd of people.  
  
  
To Nori's pleased surprise he rather immediately acquired a tall, gorgeous shadow. This was _very_ promising. Unless Thorin was just really thirsty, because then Bofur was _not_ forgiven for being a co-, well, flirt-block. If such a thing could be said to exist.

  
  
Nori's good mood lasted until he saw the mess Bofur had made of the kitchen.

 

"I see you've already tried to make pancakes," he said and stepped over the two eggs on the floor. Not eggs still in their shells, no. That would have been too easy.

 

"Bombur is the cook in the family," Bofur said in lieu of an apology and aimed a somewhat wobbly but still charming and boyish smile at Nori. "Please feed me?"

  
  
Unfortunately for Bofur, that type of smile no longer worked on Nori. Repeated exposure had dulled the effect, and Nori had known Bofur for ages.  
  


"What's in it for me?" Nori asked and folded his arms over his chest. “Except for what is a very messy floor and an even messier counter? Did you bloody well explode the flour?”

  
  
Bofur was clearly on his way to being incredibly drunk, but if Nori could convince him to trade pancakes in exchange for… let’s say for borrowing his precious motorcycle some other time… well that would definitely be worth the pancakes. And the mess.

  
  
And getting friends to agree to things while drunk was totally above board, right? It wasn’t like he was asking for a kidney.

 

Bofur’s forehead creased as he appeared to be thinking very hard. "For you- I'll, um." His face brightened. "I'll _sleep_ with you if you feed me."

 

"Bofur," Tauriel sighed exasperatedly and leaned back against the wall. “Don't prostitute yourself."

 

"At least not for food," Elladan added, his brother nodding along and shoved another handful of popcorn in his mouth.

 

"You'll sleep with me?" Nori asked, one eyebrow quirking upwards, corner of his lips following suit.

 

"Sure," Bofur promised, smiling brightly at Nori. "Whenever you'd like. _Wherever_ you like even.”

  
  
Nori grinned at him, not because he wanted to take him up on the offer (though Bofur was nice enough in bed) but because the tall, gorgeous shadow Nori had acquired earlier did now appear to be _sulking_ , and he was aiming a rather displeased glare at Bofur. Scratch 'very promising' and bring out the lube! If Nori had been able to purr he’d been drowning out all the other sound in the flat.

 

"I repeat,” Nori said and winked at Bofur. “What's in it for me?"

 

It took Bofur a second to get it, then he burst out laughing. "Ach, you wound me terribly."

  
  
“Uh-huh,” Nori said, glancing at Thorin out of the corner of his eyes, a thrill of excitement running down his spine when he noticed that blue eyes were already looking at him. “I’m sure. Now clean up my kitchen. No pancakes.”

  
  
Bofur slumped. “But _pancakes_?”

  
  
“No,” Nori shook his head. “There’s plenty of other things to eat that doesn’t require actual cooking.”

  
  
Elrohir wrapped his arms around the bowl of popcorn and made noises that were quite possible to interpret as the possessive kind.

  
  
“Waffles?” Bofur said hopefully.

  
  
“Clean,” Nori prompted and pointed Bofur to the sink. “Now,” he said, turning to Thorin. “What would you liked to drink? Beer, wine, Bofur’s tears which will be available unless he actually begins to _clean_ soon?”

  
  
“Too salty,” Tauriel mused. “Unless you’re making something with tomato juice.”

 

-  
  
Later, after a few drinks, some actual uninterrupted flirting, and Nori _accidentally_ spilling wine on himself so he _had_ to take off his shirt (after which he conveniently forgot that his wardrobe – with or without Narnias - was merely a room away), Nori had Thorin just where he wanted him. Well, right at the start of it at least.

  

"It doesn't have to mean anything," Nori promised as he wound his arms around Thorin’s very broad and very nice shoulders, his hands carding through silky hair. "You don't even have to ask for my number and pretend you'll call."

 

"I see,” Thorin said, and Nori did definitely not shiver at the feeling of Thorin’s chest rumbling against his. And again, definitely not as Thorin’s hands stroked over his hips and waist, one hand continuing upwards to brush through Nori’s pony tail.

 

" _I_ certainly see," Nori murmured. "See that you're _gorgeous_."  
  
  
  
It wasn’t even an exaggeration, so Nori was surprised to see a hint of colour touch Thorin’s cheeks. “Oh, that’s not fair,” Nori breathed and rocked up on his toes so he could touch their lips together. The pretty lips he’d been admiring for much too long immediately opened beneath his and Nori groaned appreciatively when one of Thorin’s thighs made itself home between his legs.

  
  
When Nori next checked back with the rest of the world he was pressed up against the wall, his legs around Thorin’s waist, and Tauriel was standing next to them, clearing her throat. The first parts of these circumstances Nori approved greatly of, the Tauriel part, not so much. And why was it so quiet all of a sudden?

  
  
“What?” Nori dragged his mouth from Thorin’s but not even trying to get back on the ground again. “You can’t stop Bofur from breaking eggs, but you feel _this_ is when you need to step in?”

  
  
“We’re leaving now,” she said, quirking an eyebrow. “Taxis are here, so we’re going to the Pony. Will you be joining us?”

 

Nori looked at the people trickling out of the apartment, then back at Thorin’s dark eyes, messy hair and wet lips, and fuck if his face alone wasn’t one of the most gorgeous things he’d ever seen, and adding to it was the rather sizeable cock pressing up against Nori’s, and the way Thorin seemed to be fine with holding up him for the foreseeable future and…  
  


“No bloody way,” Nori said and tightened his legs around Thorin’s hips. “But scram with my thanks and blessings.”

  
  
And because Tauriel was a horrible human being she turned to Thorin and asked if he was staying too.

  
  
“Bad Tauriel,” Nori growled and wrapped himself a little tighter still around Thorin. “I saw him first.”

  
  
“Just being a decent person,” Tauriel said innocently. “In case you’ve trapped him here against his will.” She turned back to Thorin. “Say the word and I’ll promise I’ll help you escape from his clutches.”

  
  
“I’m fine,” Thorin said. “Only, if you see Dwalin, the tall-“

  
  
“Yeah I know Dwalin,” Tauriel said.

  
  
“Tell him that I stayed behind.”

  
  
“Sure,” Tauriel shrugged, smirk growing as someone called for Nori to join them and Nori flipped them off without even looking.

 

"Thank fuck,” Nori breathed as the front door slammed shut. “Bedroom, now please.”

  
  
“I’m not sure,” Thorin said, hands sliding down to cup Nori’s arse. “I quite like this.”

  
  
“You think you can hold me like this while fucking me?” Nori asked. “Because that _could_ mean you know you’ll be finished in three minutes flat, and quite honestly, that would be rather disappointing. I’d rather your arms give up before your cock.”

 

Thorin chuckled and, in a quite impressive show of strength, hoisted Nori higher up against the wall until he could almost move his legs over Thorin’s shoulders instead of around his hips.  


“Oh, hello,” Nori said as Thorin slowly brought him down again, and then back up, pausing to press wet kisses to Nori’s bare chest. “Yes, that is impressive. My faith in your arm muscles is much- hey, why haven’t I ever seen you at the gym?”

  
  
“I don’t know, because I’ve been,” Thorin said with a small shrug. “If we’re talking about the same gym Dwalin works at.”

  
  
“Huh,” Nori said. “Well, this will teach me to avoid the weight lifting parts of it. I guess you wouldn’t be looking to take any classes on self-defence? Sleeping with the teacher would be guaranteed to give you a good grade. Well, if I graded my students.” Nori grinned down at him. “Though getting your teacher on his back on the mat is a show of great skill.”

  
  
“Really?” Thorin said. “And up against the wall?”

  
  
Nori snorted. “Not part of the curriculum. Because unless you’ve got lube and condom on you, I’d propose we do relocate the bedroom.”

  
  
“Fair enough,” Thorin agreed, but instead of putting Nori down he merely tightened his grip. “So where’s the bedroom?”

  
  
“Put me down first,” Nori said, mostly to check if Thorin would be the stubborn sort or not. Playing was fun, but not listening to direct requests was not. Which was why it was a relief when Thorin allowed him to slide his legs down without needing to be prompted further.

  
  
Nori gave him a kiss for such excellent behaviour, enjoying the feeling of Thorin’s beard on his skin. Tomorrow it might seem like a less brilliant idea, but at the moment the scratchy tingly sensation made shivers go down Nori’s spine.

  
  
“Bed,” he repeated and took Thorin’s hand to pull him along just in case he'd get lost on the way.  
  
  
-  
  


By the time Thorin worked three fingers into him, Nori war more than ready for it. He was panting and trying to wriggle down to get more, faster, _now_.

  
  
“Come on, fuck me already,” Nori demanded. “I’m- nooo! Not more lube,” he whined when Thorin reached for the little tube with his free hand. “Just fuck me. I’m-“

  
  
“You are very chatty,” Thorin remarked, curling his fingers and making Nori swear.

  
  
“You’re only now realising this?” Nori hissed as he twisted his hand down into the sheets. “You’re lucky you’re fucking pretty.”

  
  
“Well I am fucking you.”

  
  
Nori stared at him. Then he started snickering. “Hah, just stick your dick in me already.”

  
  
He threw his right leg over Thorin’s shoulder, opening himself up further. “Come on. Condom. In me. _Now_.”

  
  
Again Thorin showed that he knew how to listen to the _important_ instructions and while continuing to fuck into Nori with three fingers, each thrust making a soft, slick, filthy sound, Thorin grabbed a condom with his free hand and brought it to his mouth to tear it open.

  
  
“Fuck, give it here,” Nori demanded. “Don’t open it with your teeth.”

 

Getting it open was the work of seconds and Thorin hissed as Nori stroked the condom down over his cock, not being able to stop himself from getting a few extra rubs in.  
  
  
Not quite as big as Dwalin, or so Nori thought. He'd only had a glimpse and it was possible that his brain had decided to make Dwalin a bit more impressive over the years, but regardless, Thorin’s cock was definitely a nice handful. Not all that long, but fat, and as hard as you could ever wish for.

 

Nori took a deep breath as Thorin moved into position, letting it out as the cockhead began to nudge into him. “Come on, come on, just-“

  
  
“Chatty-” Thorin growled before pushing the rest of the way inside in a swift move.

  
  
“Fuck, yeah,” Nori moaned, heels digging into Thorin’s back and arse respectively. “Oh, I was so ready for that. And it was nice, mind, but-”

  
  
“-but not very patient,” Thorin concluded, rocking his hips back and forth.  
  


“What is this a character review? In which case: you’re gorgeous, but so far not a very good fuck.”  
  
  
  
That was not necessarily true, but what was a little white lie between two people in bed, eh?

  
  
Thorin’s eyes narrowed, and Nori smirked at him. “I’m willing to give you a chance to do better though. Impress me.” He wriggled his hips downwards as best as he could. “I’m waiting.”

  
  
“I’m beginning to see that much of what Dwalin has told me about you was actually true,” Thorin muttered, and the bastard did not _move_.

  
  
“He talked about me?” Nori batted his eyelashes. “Only nice things I hope.”

  
  
“He forgot to mention that you’re beautiful.” And while Nori was working his way through surprised delight to preening Thorin began to thrust at a steady pace. Pressing up against Nori’s prostate on every slide.

  
  
“That, ah, that _was_ a compliment, right?” Nori panted as he clutched at Thorin and the sheets.

  
  
“How is telling someone they’re beautiful an insult?” Thorin grunted, and he sounded adorably disgruntled.

  
  
“I don’t know, you didn’t sound that pleased about it?”

  
  
“I don’t know that I am,” Thorin said. “I’d not planned on this happening.”

  
  
“Heard of the expression: a pleasant surprise?” Nori asked as he wrapped a hand around his cock, not rubbing, just holding. “Plans are bloody useless anyway.”

  
  
“I wanted you the moment I saw you,” Thorin said, his voice a low thunder in his chest, and those ridiculously pretty eyes intent on Nori’s. “That’s- that’s new.”  
  
  
  
“Lucky me,” Nori murmured and clenched down as hard as he could around Thorin’s cock.  
  
  
  
Thorin froze, almost seemed to vibrate for a moment. “Fuck,” he growled and Nori tried to arrange his face in as a close approximation of earnestness as he could and nodded.

  
  
“Yes, please.” He did definitely not whine when Thorin pulled out of him. “No, what-“ But he didn’t get any further than that before Thorin had thrown Nori’s other leg over his shoulder as well, and catching on Nori tried as best as he could to help tilt his arse up, holding on to the back of his knees to spread himself a little wider still.

  
  
Thorin felt even bigger as he sank back in, and the little air Nori had left in his lungs disappeared when Thorin leaned in for a kiss, bending Nori effectively in half. Not that Nori was bothered by it. Who needed air when there was someone to suck on your tongue while fucking you rather brilliantly? Not him. But it was lucky he had a job that helped keep him limber.  
  
  
  
“I want to see you come all over yourself,” Thorin growled, hips picking up speed, slapping against Nori’s arse with dull, fleshy smacks. “Without touching your cock."  
  
  
  
“Oh, better fuck me good then,” Nori groaned. “Think you can do that? Or should I have taken Bofur up on his offer?”  
  
  
  
Nori couldn’t help but grin as Thorin’s eyes flashed and he started pounding into him with quick, deep thrusts. “Fuck yeah,” Nori said and arched as back. “Just like that. Keep that up.”  
  
  
  
“Do you _ever_ stop talking?”  
  
  
  
Nori puckered his lips in an exaggerated kissy face. “Give me something better to do then.”  
  
  
  
There was another flash in blue eyes, and Nori could seriously get addicted to seeing that expression on Thorin’s face, and then his mouth was being claimed just as thoroughly as his arse was being fucked. Nori gave as good as he got though, nipping and sucking and licking and doing his very best not to just lie back and melt into a puddle of nerves.  
  
  
  
Nothing that amazing could last forever, but Nori’s orgasm still managed to take him by surprise. As the wave started cresting Nori released his knees to clutch at Thorin’s arms. He arched his back, and Thorin was quick to take advantage of his bared neck to pepper it with kisses and bites.  
  
  
  
“Yes,” Thorin hissed. “Come for me.” And with a groan Nori spilled all over his stomach and chest. Gasping and shuddering all the while.  
  
  
  
Thorin pulled back and managed to somehow get a hand free to smear through the mess, half-lidded eyes locked with Nori’s as he painted Nori’s skin with the pale white liquid, 'round and 'round Nori's still stiff cock lying against his stomach.  
  
  
  
His thrusts were quick and rough, and Nori – trembling a little from the force of his climax – reached up to cup Thorin’s face, brushing his thumbs over the bearded cheeks.  
  
  
  
“Come on, fuck me so deep I’ll feel it when you come, even with the condom.”  
  


And no lie, Nori felt Thorin’s cock twitch at the suggestion, and it made him grin. “Yeah, just like that. I want to feel you when you fill me up.”  
  
  
  
“Chatty,” Thorin growled and Nori huffed out a breathless laugh.

  
  
“Yeah, you’re not enjoying yourself at all are you?”

 

-

 

“I’d say thank you-“ Nori began as he followed Thorin to the door. “But-“  
  
  
  
"If I ask for your number, would you give it to me?" Thorin had stopped, and he looked down at Nori with an expression that didn’t reveal anything about what he was actually thinking.  
  


"Would you call?"  
  


"Would you answer?"

 

Nori tilted his head to the side. "I think I would."

 

"I would call."

 

"I feel like we've arranged a business merger of some sort,” Nori said with a snort. “Give me your mobile.”  
  
  
  
Adding his number and pressing call was the work of moments, and somewhere inside the flat a cheerful tune began playing.  
  
  
  
“There,” Nori said. “Now I’ve got yours as well, less pressure.”  
  
  
  
“You think I’ll answer?” Thorin asked and Nori laughed.  
  
  
  
“Your loss if you don’t.”  
  
  
  
They looked at each other for a few moments, Nori admiring the state he’d left Thorin’s lips in; perfection could be improved on after all, and then he reached up for a kiss, almost chaste compared to the ones they’d previously exchanged.  
  
  
  
“Bye.”  
   


"I'll call you,” Thorin promised as he brushed his thumb over Nori’s cheek.  
  


"You better."

**Author's Note:**

> Just read through once due to time being an issue, please forgive any mistakes until I've had a chance to look at it again.
> 
> And now I've looked at it again, so anything left that's wonky is just me being blind, lol.


End file.
